mood : 
bEtWeEn oKay aNd BaD
weather : *sH|niNg*
didn't know why i am feeling this way. it certainly hasn't been what i wanted to. but things had been so perfect the past few weeks until some cruel twist of fate got me seriously thinking about my life and everything i've been through. Days hasn't been the same since, and though i do fall in and out of crush. i don't feel the same now. Some more important things could get these stuffs off my mind a little bit.. maybe for a while, but they soon come back. Of course, studies do get crushes out of my mind until i gets sleepy and i lose concentration.. then i'll start thinking of all sorts of things. When people tells me there's no difference between love and crush.. i don't believe it. and i still am not believing it. i do think there's a difference between love and crush.
the problem is, i am so sure what i am having now are only some kinda stupid crush which could be forgotten sooner or later. who knows. it's been the same the few times before this. and i wonder why am i always doing what i am doing -- craving for something so out of reach.
bad lucks and unexpected events had got me into thoughts that might never cross my mind in a million years. things that i've been taking for granted suddenly seemed so fragile.. like they would break anytime.. and i think the last thing i ever need is to reassure myself that things are going to be alright, because i know i would only be lying to myself. There are times i do believe that some things are meant to be taken for granted. But i was too naïve to ever realize we just have to let some things go. Things that don't belong to us would never be ours in the end.
posted by Nic @ 16:20
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