deGra[v]itated

hApPy BeLatEd biRthdaY Emma!!! *hUgGs
and HaPpY bIRtHdaY too Christy!!!!!!

posted by Nic @ 13:43

When you feel that you've had enough
And you know that it's just too much
Don't look back you've got to walk right on
One day soon you're gonna realise
Your time must surely come...

And every day I feel I'm learning more
I search out for the positive babe
and the rest I ignore,
Our future lies in each others' hands,
Never look back.

We've got to wait for the day
When we finally say
Tomorrrow will bring a better way
If we hold on to the love
Then we'll have enough,
And tomorrow will bring a better day...

Just because it's all been said and done,
It doesn't mean you won't find
the strength again to carry on,
Keep the faith and you'll pick up again,
Don't worry, baby,
you've got to start first,
Before you reach the end...

And everyday I feel I'm learning more,
I search out for the positive
and the rest I ignore,
Our future lies in each others' hands,

You gotta keep on waiting for the love,
Waiting for the love...
You gotta keep on waiting..

And everyday I feel I'm learning more,
I search out for the positive and the rest I ignore,
Our future lies in each others' hands,
Never look back, never, never look back.

posted by Nic @ 13:17

mood : hungry
weather : -
Can't wait for exams to be over, all the same dreading for the first paper. The seminars are finally over!! yayy... well, it was nothing really that great. cause it'll mean i'm all on my own now.

i have gotten all my subject teachers to give me my forecast results. i spent 2 days.. only the first period of each day searching for my teachers. i had to go all the way up to fourth floor and all the way down to ground floor. and did it twice cause i reprinted it and all. The results were.. uMm.. considerably okay, but not exactly good. It was just.. okay..pass. dad was happy with it. Said it was okay and bla bla bla. yeh right. they aren't exactly my real results. If they are.. i'll guess i would be somehow happier. i haven't been working hard enough for my trials anyway. Basically read everything last minute in the exam hall.

i can feel my head spinning rounds during physics today... i must've fell sick! hahahaha.. nahh. anyway, it wasn't really funny, and i guess i really laughed when that transparency looks like it's flying up and away from the marker board and he was jumping and screaming "ahh..ahh.."! lmao. took some pics with our bio+chem+physics teacher who we'd known since early last year. and then took a pic with mr. murugan, and maths teacher..and went over to McDs for lunch - we sat at their reserved-for-a-party area..heh and then well.. nothing much.

i wish i could go out :( can't stand not going out to the malls. lol. it's been like... two weeks(?!) *sigh*
then had an extremely long chat on the phone with Sarah after reading this magazine, and then i get on to do some add math. and me going to school tmrw! :P me offta watch gilmore girls now... hee

posted by Nic @ 22:01

mood : aDdMatH-iSh
weather : sunny
and there's this anonymous person who sms-ed me all of a sudden - whose number has only 6, 7 and 3; who claimed to have my number in his phonebook, and knows me only by name. he's so *ewww* and duh. so i just ignored all his following sms. haahaa. and i replied only a one syllabus words but he's bold enough to still continued on messaging.

wanna go out next week?
i wanna meet u..can?
i'll take u out for dinner...
what do u say?
Sender : ####
Sent : 21-Oct-2002, 16:57:28

know what i want to say? "Thanks but no thanks. I've got better things to do" :) LoL. but i chose to ignore him instead. haahaa :P

posted by Nic @ 17:23

i skipped school today!!! haha.. but it's not exactly on purpose. i somehow woke up late. so i planned to skip it. LoL. Mom woke me up at about 11:20. gawsh. i can't believe i actually slept for 10 long hours?! geeeeezz. and i had ultimately weird dreams.

oh, sarah forced me into telling her something which i really don't want to tell. haha. Okay, maybe it was me who suddenly felt a pang of guilt for not telling her stuffs like that when she tells me about hers. Even ck knows about it already. Usually only seyin knows about all these. Hahaa. So i told her, but i know i don't stand a chance anyway...both of them. LoL. so i'm trying my best to not think about them. I wonder why's sarah being so negative about herself. she's all that and who won't like her? i have reasons to believe that he likes her!! Whahahaaa..

posted by Nic @ 14:25

Know all about your reputation
And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation
But I can't help it if I'm helpless
Everytime that I'm where you are,

You walk in and my strength walks out the door
Say my name and I can't fight it any more
Oh I know, I should go
But I need your touch just too damn much
Lovin' you...
isn't really something I should do
Should I wanna spend my time with you, yeah
I should try to be strong
But baby you're the right kind of wrong
yeah baby you're the right kind of wrong

Might be a mistake
A mistake I'm makin'
But what you're givin' I am happy to be takin'
'Cause no one's ever made me feel
The way I feel when I'm in your arms

They say you're somethin' I should do without
They don't know what goes on when the lights go out
There's no way to explain
All the pleasure is worth all the pain

I should try to run but I just can't seem to
'Cause every time I run you're the one I run to
Can't do without what you do to me,
I don't care if I'm in too deep

Know all about your reputation
And now it's bound to be a heartbreak situation
But Ican't help it if I'm helpless
Every time that I'm where you are,

You walk in and my strength walks out the door
Say my name and I can't fight it any more
Oh, I know I should go
But I need your touch just too damn much
Lovin' you, yeah, isn't really something I should do
Should I wanna spend my time with you
Well I should try to be strong,
I should try to be strong
But baby you're the right kind of wrong

posted by Nic @ 14:10

"HaPpy birthday to u... haPpy biRthday 2 u..haPpY bIRthday to cJ!! happy biRtHdaY 2 u!!!"

posted by Nic @ 21:57

Today is gonna be the day
that they're gonna throw it back to you
By now you shoulda somehow realized
what you gotta do
I don't believe that anybody feels
the way I do about you now

Back beat, the word is on the street
that the fire in your heart is out
I'm sure you've heard it all before
but you never really had a doubt
I don't believe that anybody feels
the way I do about you now

And all the roads we have to walk are winding
And all the lights that lead us there are blinding
There are many things that
I would like to say to you
But I don't know how

Because maybe,
You're gonna be the one that saves me
And after all...you're my wonderwall

Today was gonna be the day
but they'll never throw it back to you
By now you shoulda somehow realized
what you're not to do

I don't believe that anybody
feels the way I do about you now
And all the roads
that lead you there were winding
And all the lights
that light the way are blinding

There are many things
that I would like to say to you
But I don't know how.

posted by Nic @ 01:44

mood : lucky
weather : windy?
# 1. i just received sis' call about an hour ago, and we chatted for about 15 minutes, before she had to rush for practise. hEe hee.. it was cool. i asked her some of the things mom was bugging me to email her, and she told me 'bout her housemates, and her days there and all. it made me wish i was there. i haven't been listening to her voice for almost a month or less now. but her voice is so significant, i recognized it right away, anytime, anyday! bWuahaha. hey, i don't even know if she knows it's me! would she think it was seyin? haHaa.

# 2. yay!! seyin have just uploaded her new layout.. it's SoOo cool. gagHh. I am getting pretty sick of this layout. but i guess it's plain and okay enough to stick here for two long months. i am so, so, so tired of new layouts.. so this one's gonna be stuck on this page for the time being..

# 3. feeling well.. some problems. ahaahaa. just felt depressed that's all. feel kinda i-don't-know. i wish i know why. bleh.

posted by Nic @ 01:17

i wasn't actually feeling not well. i was just feeling way too bored and i had my head spinning round, but i am positive i am not catching a cold or fever. HeHe. Cause i am seldom sick :) I did some Biology revision today, thanks to boonwah for scaring me with some Bio questions, and ck for cracking my brains with some CHem yesterday. Oh, but otherwise, i didn't really study.

aww... sarah... i like that prefect guy better than jen! *bWuaHahaaa*

posted by Nic @ 01:03

mood : dUh
weather : sunny
i'm so, so, so sick. skipped school yesterday and today and i did nothing so far.

posted by Nic @ 13:53

How Emotional Are You?

posted by Nic @ 15:05

mood : *shrug*
weather : -
haPpY biRtHdAyYy sHiR!!!

posted by Nic @ 15:11

I know we're just like old friends
we just can't pretend
that lovers make amends
we are reasons so unreal
we can't help but feel that something has been lost
but please you know you're just like me
next time I promise we'll be
perfect
perfect
perfect strangers down the line
lovers out of time
memories unwind

so far I still know who you are
but now I wonder who I was...

angel, you know it's not the end
we'll always be good friends
the letters have been sent on
so please, you always were so free
you'll see, I promise we'll be
perfect
perfect strangers when we meet
strangers on the street
lovers while we sleep

perfect
you know this has to be
we always were so free
we promised that we'd be
perfect

posted by Nic @ 14:58

I think you're already gone.
I think I'm finally scared now
You think I'm weak - But I think you're wrong
I think you're already leaving
Feels like your hand is on the door
I thought this place was an empire
But now I'm relaxed - I can't be sure

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - I think too much
I know this is wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
Cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

I bet you're hard to get over
I bet the room just won't shine
I bet my hands I can stay here
I bet you need - more than you mind

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - that I know too much
I can't relate and that's a problem
I'm feeling

If you're gone - maybe it's time to go home
There's an awful lot of breathing room
But I can hardly move
If you're gone - baby you need to come home
cuz there's a little bit of something me
In everything in you

I think you're so mean - I think we should try
I think I could need - this in my life
I think I'm just scared - do I talk too much
I know it's wrong it's a problem I'm dealing

posted by Nic @ 22:41

mood : traShY
weather : sunny
i'm not feelin quite well today, well, perhaps suffered from lack of sleep. i meant to blog more last night, but i was way too tired. anyway, i slept at about 2:12am and woke up at 6:00am. Did some revision before going off for tuition which starts at about.. 8:30 *i think*. Dad gave me a drive home after classes and i got the whole house to myself since seyin went to Universiti Malaya for this Chem seminar or something like that.

aw i can't wait for November 26th. i've got loads of plans coming up! like..sarah's planning on going for lunch right after our last paper.. sounds kinda cool! dOn't leave me out! And we planned on going shopping together sometime. haHa. for anything at all. and i am dying to see how gorgeous everyone will turn out to be on prOm night. that's if we ever have one. No one seem to be talking about it so far. Everyone's too caught up with the trials and the Gerak Gempur and SPM.

anyway, here's what i did.. i got bored and started playing around with some pics.. like here's a pic of my guitar. i know the pic looks horrible, well, i ain't that good at graphics, and well, i modified it while i was online, so basically i just simply mess about. [here]

well, this is how it actually looks like.. Dad bought it for me and sis few years back and i seriously don't really know how to play the guitar! HaHhaaaHa.. so the guitar only stood there beside the piano now, and sometimes i would try strumming it a little.

posted by Nic @ 17:37

i think Jenny Malai Ali is sOo0o pretty!! geez. how outdated am i to know only today that Paula Malai Ali actually have an identical twin sis?! keekee.. aww.. they both looked so alike!

This is a picture taken on the way to klia, in the car. who can guess if this is seyin or me? :)

posted by Nic @ 16:49

So long ago, I don't remember when
That's when they say I lost my only friend
Well they said she died easy of a broken heart disease
As I listened through the cemetery trees

I seen the sun comin' up at the funeral at dawn
The long broken arm of human law
Now it always seemed such a waste
She always had a pretty face
I wondered how she hung around this place

Hey, come on try a little
Nothing is forever.
There's got to be something better than in the middle
But me & Cinderella
We put it all together
We can drive it home
With one headlight

She said it's cold
It feels like Independence Day
And I can't break away from this parade
But there's got to be an opening
Somewhere here in front of me
Through this maze of ugliness and greed
And I seen the sun up ahead
At the county line bridge
Sayin' all there's good and nothingness is dead
We'll run until she's out of breath
She ran until there's nothin' left
She hit the end - it's just her window ledge

Hey, come on try a little..
Nothing is forever
There's got to be something better than
In the middle
But me & Cinderella
We put it all together
We can drive it home
With one headlight

Well this place is old
It feels just like a beat up truck
I turn the engine, but the engine doesn't turn
Well it smells of cheap wine & cigarettes
This place is always such a mess
Sometimes I think I'd like to watch it burn
I'm so alone, and I feel just like somebody else
Man, I ain't changed
But I know I ain't the same
But somewhere here in between the city walls of dyin' dreams
I think her death it must be killin' me..

wallflowers - one headlight

posted by Nic @ 14:57

mood : cool
weather : rainy
it's been a pretty busy week though i didn't succeed to study much. it's usual tuitions and all, and hardly have time to do somethings i'd like to do. but well, i had time to go online. haha. i've just sent sis some pics taken before she left at the airport. there's this one i took alone. eWww..don't know what the heck happened to my hair. There are some pics we took with her at klia right before she leave.[more]..

i skipped school today. Unintentionally. I woke up late, so i thought I should just stay at home; rather than getting another offence slip or whatever slip is that, i know reaching school in 10 minutes time is impossible. i'd actually changed into my school uniform..lol. anyway, i sms-ed sarah to see if she did go to school or not. i was soooo sleepy that i actually slept while reading Biology! i woke up again at 1 something in the afternoon i think, taking an extra 3 hours sleep in the morning.. wasted the morning.. *sigh* lol. but i did some add math questions. Until i got stuck at this question.

btw, here's something i wanna shoutout..
oii.. ck.. u better watch out!! don't ever membocorkan rahsia. u faham-fahamler...

posted by Nic @ 00:06

mood : dang-ed
weather : rainy
ahh.. it rained just now! just puts me in a sleeping mood. gOt back history paper today.. finally bleh.. and got really low - as a result of not revising earlier and uM.. fell asleep while reading it.. but well, *shrugs* it's still an A ..

i don't know what happened to me recently, i had been so damn forgetful.. i must be getting old. i've been cracking my brains just trying to recall where i have just placed my keys, and i almost thought i lost them. And then i thought i lost my ribbon, only to find out in school today that i've folded it and placed it in my wallet; though i don't remember when i did that - must've been during free time in tuition yesterday. and i even complained to mom that i've been losing a lot of stuffs lately, but i guess they're not lost, it's just the absent-minded syndrome. i'm getting old.. i'm old i'm getting old.. aHahaha

ahaha.. go check out some reaaally funny pics ck took with his digicam.

posted by Nic @ 18:34

mood : geeZz
weather : -
got back a few more papers today. I just got to know yesterday that we'll be throwing a party in class this Friday.. and we're doing this pot luck thingy. wOooHoOOo! I still feel like going out this Saturday, but *sigh* maybe i should learn to really sit down at home and hit the books. *daNg* it's only one pathetic month. And yet i am still day-dreaming here. There had been sooo many seminars going on lately, and i had been to none. Almost none. Unless the one at Universal, and the upcoming one in my tuition centre counts..lol.. With a very high possibility that Sarah and i will chatting away again. I hope we won't though.

posted by Nic @ 23:00

I like this song, but not the meaning though. =P

If you see me walking down the street
Staring at the sky and dragging my two feet
You just pass me by
You still makes me cry
But you could make me whole again

And if you see me with another man
Laughing and joking, doing what i can
I'm trying to put you down
Baby I still want you around
Cause you can make me whole again

Looking back on when we first met
Can't escape and I cannot forget baby you're the one
You still turn me on
You can make me whole again

Time is laying heavy on my heart
Seems I've got too much of it since we've been apart
My friends make me smile if only for a while
But you can make me whole again

Looking back on when we first met
Can't escape and I cannot forget baby you're the one
You still turn me on
You can make me whole again

For now I have to wait
But baby if you change your mind
Don't be too late, cause I just can't go on
It's already been too long
But you could make me whole again

posted by Nic @ 22:45